If He Knows What's Good For Him

"Honey, close your eyes."
"Are they closed?"
"Close 'em. . . "

I heard the husband shaking something as he walked from the kitchen to the family room. "I got you something yesterday." Me, ohhhhh (excitement!). . . maybe some diamonds! ?

"Open your eyes. . ."

"Awwww . . . it's GODIVA! Love it, honey! Thank you!"

"Well, uhhh . . .I know you don't like Godiva, but I thought . . ."

"What? Since when have I ever told you I don't like Godiva?"

"I swear you told me that."

"When?"

The husband replied in all his seriousness, "well, then I guess that must've been my mistress who doesn't like Godiva then. . . I don't know." To which my final answer to that remark was, "yeah. 'Cos you have time for one of those. For God sake, my friends already think you're fake."