Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Undeniable Relief

Last night, laying in bed before the husband had to leave for work, we were watching a high quality movie, "The Marine":

moi: honey. . . if I was kidnapped, would you come save me?
the husband: I would try, but I doubt I'd be as successful as that guy. . . .I'm not a big bad-ass like he is.
moi: awww . . . . but, honey, you're my big bad-ass! All that matters is that you'd try!

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There are many things I want to do. There are many things that the husband wants to do. There are many things the husband and I want to do together. This is not regularly possible. Sometimes I no longer feel as if there is enough time. There are always two directions available to each of us. We can take one or the other. I constantly hope that we choose the path of living life even if it proves to be the difficult course. Even if that is not one of the two choices offered.

Both the husband and I have been working long hours; barely passing one another in the bedroom. Lately, "goodbye" and "goodnight" are the staples of our communication. I have foregone the gym this week in order to just have dinner with him - to make sure he has not become a complete stranger. To know I haven't forgotten the lines of his smile, the tone of his voice and the pitch of his laughter. My biggest fear is that the "we" in us dissolves into the "one" alone. I don't want to begin again. I don't want to make my past transgressions once more. I don't want to lose. I've made the mistakes I've already made. I do not wish to go there once more - at least not alone. I am lucky to have the better-half I do as that path won't be trodden.

As an anniversary gift to one another, we have chosen to take a trip to the mountains. The two of us alone together for a week - hiking the Grand Teton National Park. We leave for Jackson Hole Saturday. I've never been. The husband says I'll forever want to stay. I just may. As long as he stays too.

I'll bring back pictures.





13 comments:

Jay said...

That's a beautiful place. Have a great time. Can't wait to see the pictures.

Iain Shanks (shanksi) said...

Looks fantastic. Hope you both have a great time.

Rock Chef said...

Hi - thought I would check out your blog, as you visited me.

The never seeing each other can be really hard on a relationship, but at least you can see the danger now - work at seeing as much of each other as you can. The hiking should be great for this, of course! Have fun!

Ian said...

Grand Teton! Ha Ha, you said Big Boobies!

Alli said...

Sounds wonderful! Yes, can't wait to see the pics.

Jackson Hole is on our list of places to go, too..... Sounds wonderful.

Make sure to go to the Mangy Moose while you are there.:)

http://www.mangymoose.net/

Emmeline said...

Well, at least the long hours at work should help fund the trip! Hope you have an excellent time, I am jealous. I can't wait to take my first extended vacation alone with The Scientist . . . which I guess will be our honeymoon. That idea appeals so much to me!

Em

mindy said...

You are a lucky lady - I'm sure your vacation will be awesome!!

Jen said...

Jay: It looks beautiful! I am super-bad excited about this trip!

Iain: I'll think of you and Vikki doing these hikes with your boys. Unfortunately, I did not think to get a "she-wee" until I was typing this. . . uh oh.

Rock Chef: Glad you're here! I sure hope it's a blast! I'll bring pictures, for sure!

Ian: Big bewbies rock! Just ask Nikki. Or maybe ask yourself? Whatever. (That was funny!)

Alli: I'm starting to knock 'em off my list one at a time too. . . Mangy Moose has thumbs up from me & some other friends of ours may have mentioned that place as well?

Em: Trips with your extended other-half are a BLAST! You'll love them!

Mindy: I am. Thanks!

Ian said...

How lonely do you think the French trappers who named those mountains were?

Jen said...

Good point, Mr. Morrison! Especially since I've come to find that they don't really resemble bewbies at all...

And they are FRIGID! It snowed on our hike today. Our 16 mile hike today. It also rained. Each of Which did so for 7 hours of our 9 hour hike. Today.

I can barely move....I have pictures to prove it.

Alex&Fi said...

Man I love those mountains. Did some walking in the Canadian Rockies when I was staying out there a few years ago. No snow though. I'm very jealous!

Tink said...

I love the mountains. So peaceful and "romantical." Have fun!

Suzie said...

wow sounds like a great weakend! can't wait to see the pics....

try watching "The Guardian" great movie!