Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Injuries May Be Forgiven, But Not Forgotten. Aesop

This post may not be for those of you who are faint of heart. If you don't like blood and guts the following photo's are not for you. It's not like I am holding my actual beating heart in my own hand, but it is not like I'm holding butterflies either. Though they were taken with my camera phone and details have been blurred & they do not look as bad as the original.

This is not a result of playing real-time Frogger in 5" stilettos:

(Please note the husband has already scrubbed out my owie.
During which I kept quietly blubbering some sort of gibberish while rocking back and forth. But it's clean. For now.)

This is what happens when your husband and you, while bike riding, pseudo-shout to a woman you are coming upon to pass, "on your left" but they do not move over. Since there was less than 12" to pass on, it seems I did not make it.

My tire caught the side of the concrete path and henceforth decided I should not remain upright. My nice warm leggings were gashed just like my knee and blood began a heavy trickle down my shin. That was gross. Vile even if you were to ask me. But your not, so I won't. I also bruised my left palm. I'm sure that will help me in school.

Anyway, I popped up right away after nonchalantly exclaiming under my breath something that rhymes with "Chuck" (sorry mom). And the offending lady offered, "I'm so sorry! Are you okay? My husband and I are always listening for cyclists as were are one's ourselves. I never heard you come up on us. I'm so sorry."

Which, to me, is a kooky-mental thing to say to someone when both of your iPod earphones are plugged into each one of your ears!

Um, duh.

So, this is my knee now (again with the camera phone, I know, I know. . . .
But my Rebel XTi's battery died, so these are what you get):

I'm fine. I did not want to wash it at first. I still don't want to wash it. The husband made me. Actually, he had to clean it as I refused to do so, but I didn't like it. It bled again. And I still don't want to clean it tomorrow or even the next day or the day after that. It also doesn't help that my Boykin Spaniel, Dixie, is following my knee around trying to lick it on a consistent basis tonight. That's gross too.


I rode 1/2-way back home and since my tire is bent the husband ran ahead to get the truck. I have to say here that every single man that passed me on the path asked if 1) I was okay and 2) if I needed help. Chivalrous - and I am very okay with that, but I'm going to wait for my husband thankyouverymuch.

The women that passed me if they even acknowledged my existence said, "hello." Oddly, I was reminded of Madeleine Albright who once said, "there is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women."

That is all. I'm pretty sure I don't look comfy nor cute.


Brad said...

I almost passed this post up and moved on to your prior one. I don't 'do' injury well. I once had an employee have a heart attack scare in the office and when the paramedics started (all they're stuff that I don't want to think about now) treating her. I passed out. Big boss guy me ! So then they had 2 patients. Lovely.

Thanks for stopping by and that's one dang cute furkid you have there as well.


tt said...

Awwww..so sorry about your boo-boo!
It looks painful as hell. Think it'll scar? Probably... right? Well, it will give you a story to tell if conversations die down at a party or something.." Hey, wanna see my scar?"...I'd look for sure...
Love the quote by M.A.
I'd never heard that before but I totally agree with her.
Work it girl...work it! ;)

Jay said...

Owie!! I bet the knee is going to be pretty stiff too. Throw back the pain meds and a couple of shots of tequila. Uhh .. I mean, take it easy for a while there. ;-)

mindy said...

Ewww! and Yikes! and OHMYGODAREYOUOKAY??

You poor thing. I hate bike injuries. A couple years ago, the first time in the spring I took my bike out, I came up to a curb and I thought "I can jump up that baby", so I tried....but I just flew over the handle bars instead. Shortest bike ride ever (1 block).

ETK said...

Aww! Poor jen!! I wouldn't want to clean it either - but at my house, we'd both stare at it and hope it goes away. :)

What biotches for passing you like that. :( women suck sometime.

Freakazojd said...

You should totally sue. ;)
Seriously though, that looks like it really hurt...I a similar round "owie" once on my knee but it was done in a completely different way. (Uh...I tripped. Nice, right?) Glad you have such a good guy to help you out because it really was a good idea to clean it up. :)

Anonymous said...

Man, that scrape is huge! I'm so sorry! Bike injuries are nothing if not brutal. I have never had an "it's nothing" bike injury. That dang concrete is so good at ripping my skin off like a freaking cheese grater!

I'm not really queasy person, but I was getting a little woozy reading about the CLEANING. I have trouble cleaning my own wounds as well. It's good you have The Husband to help you out with that!! (It's always easier for a second party to rub and burn and sting and scrape someone else's injury than for us to force ourselves to do it!)


g-man said...

Bummer!! We are the same way when we walk for the same reasons. In fact about every third step I have to remind the girls "Keep to the right" or "Single file" or "get your finger out of your nose"

I'm glad that your hubby is taking good care of you.

Shouldn't wear 5 inch stilettos biking either. ;)

Ian said...

Ow, Jeez. This is why you should mountain bike instead of doing road biking. There's a better chance of landing on something soft when you crash. There's also a slightly elevated chance of landing on something really not soft, but let's not get into that now.

R.E.H. said...

Ouch... now MY knee hurts, just from reading this and seeing the pics.

Rest that baby up, and keep it clean even if it hurts - believe me it will hurt worse if it gets infected.

Jen said...

Brad: I heart my fur kid! All six of 'em!

I used to be really good with injury stuff growing up. I've lost all my cajones when it comes to it now. I even felt faint AND sick when the husband was scrubbing it out. It helped he had me count to 10 - it took my mind off feeling ill. . .

I tried to be "nice" on this post. I did. Promise.

tt: it hurts like hell too. STILL. As in TODAY it still hurts. Basically I fell straight down on it so hard I gashed it open. There's a bit of a hole that you can't see in the photo. Well enough off with out that, believe me.

I'll remember that for next party time. . .

Jay: mmmmm. . . tequila. . . Oh wait! Tequila is the bane of my existence. It is evil and vile. But I'll do Vodka for sure!

ETK: Yes, I am okay. I bit bruised and battered is all. Thanks for asking! I so still don't want to clean it. I was mumbling to myself in the tub, "I don't wanna do it" over and over while rocking back and forth, when the husband came in and said he'd do it. Apparently, he was out there listening to me, started laughing and decided to be my white knight in shiny shiny armor! It effing hurt, as you would say!

freakazojd: hilarious! I never thought about suing. . . I need to go back and ride that path again until I find her.

I'm glad I have that guy to help me too. I wasn't kidding that I was not going to clean it!

Em: That was perfectly put and exactly how I feel: Cheese Grater. My mom has an even worse story of having been scraped out. Might be a future post here?

Mom? Is it okay I post your story?

g-man: I should have just taken her out. I was trying to be nice and not flat out flatten out the walker, but it didn't help me b/c she had both of her frickin' ear phones in! What's up with that? I ALWAYS only wear one for that same reason - to be able to hear other people coming up behind me.

Which is why I thought she was an utter loon for saying what she did.

Ian: You're right. I don't ever remember hurting myself on my mtn. bike the way I did on my road bike. I've never crashed on my road bike, but I've crashed hard on my mtn. bike and walked away pretty good. Or maybe I was just young and felt no pain?

r.e.h.: I still don't want to clean it. I tried as long as I could this morning while in the shower to avoid doing so. I let water drip on it and then let the soap drip on it. I still can't clean it properly myself. It hurts too damn much. I never thought I was a woos. . .

Jen said...

errr. . . . I mean, wus. duh, Jen. duh.

Alli said...

Poor chickie-chickie!!!

You feelin better today?

Man, I totally agree. Woman can be such WITCHES sometimes. ug. Probably why I usually get a long with men better & don't trust most women (accept you and few others). :)

Jen said...

Alli: so true, but it's why I trust you and not many others too. I heart you!

I'm more sore today than I was yesterday and I was sore then too. This is ass-backwards. . . .

Bethando said...

AAAAAhhhhhh. Ouch. I am so sorry that happend. AAAAAAhhhh. :(

On a up note, though, I wrote down that Madeleine Albright quote and I intend to use that as the slogan for my female revolution. Thanks!